What is a legendary lover?
Man, myth, legend- in bed, which one are you?
Later in this ongoing series you will have the opportunity to find out, but for now, you’re most likely to be a mere man. A study published in 2022 found that women still lag behind men in the satisfaction stakes, with men orgasming 91% of the times they have sex, compared to just 39% of women.
Historically, this might be a new low. Back in the Viking ages when the myths of the Norse Gods were being written, women demanded pleasure from their lovers. And they got it. It was perfectly acceptable for a woman to divorce her husband for failing to satisfy her in bed. Men spent hours learning what turned their partners on. Inspired by Norse Goddesses like Freyja – goddess of fertility, love and sex – they spent time learning the secret to bringing their lovers to the pinnacle of pleasure, over and over again.
If you’ve skipped this vital handing down of knowledge, pull up a chair. I’ll teach you the Nordic God ways.
Sex Secrets of the Nordic Gods and Goddesses
While a lot of Norse mythology has been lost to history or cleaned-up by the Christians who wrote it down, we do still know a few tricks that went on behind the scenes.
Rest and relaxation
Like the Vikings, Nordic Gods and Goddesses believed in playing with their partners. Relationships were usually equals, and if extra-curriculum partners were sought, they were for fun only and didn’t affect the sanctity of the marriage.
Legendary love Lesson: Ensure your relationship is working outside the bedroom before you try to spice things up inside. Clean the kitchen. Wash the dishes. Look after the kids. Run your partner a bath. Time spent pleasing each other in a non-sexual way will pay DIVIDENDS next time you get naked.
The plains of Idavoll were said to be fertile with wild herbs and medicinal plants. The Nordic Gods would use those for first aid, to improve their strength in combat, and (most importantly for us) massively boost their performance and stamina in bed.
By analysing the plains of Scandinavia, we know which plants are likely to have inspired the Nordic tales. These are the natural remedies you can still buy today that are believed to boost your sex life. We’ve carefully blended these together in our all-natural herbal sex enhancer, Idavoll. BUYING LINK.
Maca: Thought in some cultures to balance female hormones, Maca has long been considered an aphrodisiac. It also helps to increase energy.
Ginseng: Most often found in Asian medicine, Ginseng has been used across the
world for centuries to help male sexual response. It’s believed to increase blood flow and therefore strengthen erections.
Zinc: This mineral is a sexual powerhouse, thought to ramp up response and raise
L-Arginine: An amino acid that helps relax the body’s blood vessels, relieving
symptoms of erectile dysfunction.
Legendary love lesson: Try using a natural blend of herbs to improve your sexual wellness.
IDAVOLL BUYING LINK HERE.
Sex and sobriety
Norse Gods were not known for their moderation. You wouldn’t have got away with Dry January with Odin, the God most likely to get a round in. In fact most Gods were said to drink wine, beer or mead. But recent research into Vikings found that they might have drunk herbal tea more often than booze. True, it was a hallucinogenic herbal tea that helped them in battle because it made them wildly aggressive and unable to feel pain – but still.
We know today that drinking is about the worst thing you can do before sex. It impedes your erections, lowers arousal, and numbs your nerve endings. Long-term, it can have negative effects on your relationship too.
Legendary love lesson: Ditch the drink and improve your sexual response by staying sober in bed. Try sharing a herbal tea with your partner. The Viking’s “stinking henbane” tea is actually poisonous, so maybe try a soothing chamomile tea, to calm your nerves and remove performance anxiety.
Prepare for a legendary night
Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or you just met each other two drinks ago, legendary lovers always prepare. It needn’t be with an evening of songs and chanting – it can be as simple as using the right soap. Read on.
Cleanliness is next to Sex-Godliness: bring forth the power of aromatherapy when you soap up before sex. Shower gels or soaps that smell like sandalwood, ylang ylang or vanilla have all been found to increase libido in men. For women, the smell of peppermint boosts their sex drive (so, unless you’ve got gold teeth like the Norse God Heimdall, swill some mouthwash).
Picture this: If you suffer from performance anxiety (and most people do), take a moment to visualise your perfect night. Research has found that the human brain can’t distinguish between experiencing an event and just imagining it. You’ll feel the same rush of happiness and confidence if you just picture yourself experiencing truly epic sex, giving you a boost in real-life too.
Stay in the zone: Many of us lose the lust by focussing on negative thoughts, our faults, or memories of past failures during sex. Stop the negativity by using a quick, effective mindfulness technique. (No, mindfulness isn’t just for middle-aged women; elite athletes use it too.) When you realise your mind is wandering, immediately focus on 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 you can hear, 2 you can taste and 1 you can smell. It’ll snap your attention straight back to the sexy matters at hand.
Let the legend live on
What really sets legendary lovers apart from mere mortals is how they finish their
lovemaking. Don’t immediately return to the land of the living – extend the moment with these techniques.
Cuddle like a God: Post-coital snuggling has health benefits and can even encourage pregnancy. By cuddling after sex, you postpone the production of the bonding hormone oxytocin, which increases trust, affection, and fondness (and can help conception).
Post-coital cool down: Massage is a great way to wind down and can help relax muscles that might have tightened during a prolonged session. Use oils containing relaxing fragrances like lavender.
Kiss: You might have forgotten to kiss during sex – or avoided it because it was too much of a turn on – so make up for that in the after-show party. Low, deep, sensual kisses help to deepen your emotional connection, while light, fleeting kisses are a fun way to lighten the mood.
To increase your sexual wellness naturally, try Idavoll.